Assalamualaikum.

It has been almost a year since I graduated from Form 6. It didn't went smoothly. There were many ups and downs. So many things happened throughout my Form 6 year, and I learned many things too!

At first I did really really bad. I didn't get any As and I barely pass the exam. I failed a lot too. For final exam, I wasn't hoping much because seeing how I did during the test before, I told myself it's okay to not get As as long as I pass the exam. That time, there were hurtful stories going on at the school about me, saying how I kept sticking with this one guy wherever I go (when actually I didn't because I was usually alone or with my girl friends) and I didn't focus in the class as I was too focused on that guy. Like seriouslyyy? I can't even look at people in their face and I have always stare on the floor so I didn't get why they "created" such stories about me. What hurt more was those stories were told to my mom and they even said my performance was getting bad because of that guy. Mannn those times were really hard. I was stressed out because of it especially when I have to endure those things alone. Oh btw, around 2 months before final exam, I got the offer to go to Politeknik. At first I would like to go there because I thought I can't do my best in Form 6 but seeing how much time I have spent and how many things I have learned in Form 6, I decided to stay and not going to Politeknik, Moreover I thought Form 6 ended faster than Politeknik hehe. As for my first semester result, alhamdulillah, I did good! I was in the class when I checked the result and I cried a lot especially after I told my family about it. 

It was the first time for my parents to congratulate me!! My mom even called me "anakku" and my dad told me to study harder to tebus my SPM result. GOSH I WAS SO TOUCHED I CAN FEEL HOW PROUD MY PARENT FELT THAT TIME!!! 😭😭😭 Since then, I told myself to study harder and believe in myself that I can do it. I even told myself I'm going to make my parent proud again. I decided to repeat 2 subjects because I didn't get A for it hahaha.

For my second semester, I can see myself improving. Back in first semester I usually got C or D for test but now nopeee I'm gettig better. But sadly, for final exam, I failed to make my parent proud again. I was scolded though ha ha ☹️

They asked why I got less A this semester compared to previous semester. I told them my CGPA is still the same and my result for Pengajian Am improved but they didn't care, they only focus on A LOL. I decided to repeat Sejarah and Pengajian Perniagaan, not gonna repeat Pengajian Am although I didn't get A for it because IT'S FREAKING HARD B+ IS ENOUGH I DON'T WANT TO LEARN THE SAME HARD THING AGAIN HAHAHA 😂😂  During this semester we were given two assignments for two subjects respectively. For Bahasa Melayu, we have to write essays such as Minit Mesyuarat, Laporan, Surat Rasmi, Surat Tidak Rasmi and more. For Pengajian Am, there were 2 topics to choose from, the first one was the respondents' satisfaction level over the facilities around them (if I'm not mistaken la huhu) and the second one was about how the respondents manage their finance. I chose the second topic and my respondents were the teachers from my secondary school, SMK Sri Perhentian.

I hate doing presentation because I don't like being the centre of attention and I think of "what if..." a lot. "What if I messed up?" What if I forgot what I want to say?" "What if I tripped and fall when I walk to the front of the class?" 😅 In Form 6, there were sooo many presentations! There were presentations almost every day. And what frustrates me was we have to present our assignment huwaaaaa 😭 Whenever I'm presenting something in the class, I have this bad habit of doing weird pose such as as if I want to fly (my Pengajian Perniagaan teacher once told the class to close the doors and windows so that I won't fly out of the classroom when I did presentation in front of the class). I laughed a lot and when someone teased me during my presentation, I'll start laughing and I. Can't. Stop. I even teared up, and I once stomped my feet while I laughed. Everyone in the class were shocked because I stomped too loud LOL. But thanks goodness when I was doing viva for my assignment, everything went smoothly! Alhamdulillah!

Finally, third semester. Ah, time flies so fast~ 😢 It was kind of hectic because we had to go to extra classes to learn the subjects that we were going to repeat. The schedule for repeat papers and third semester final exam were so close to each other. I was the kind of person who "enjoyed" studying last minute so it was sooo frustrating. The teachers said it's okay to not come to school during examination week when we have no exam as attendance weren't taken during that week but I came every day to study (because trust me, I won't study when I'm home). Among my friends, there were only me, Aidah and Saudi that came. We were so envious of our friends who stayed at home as they can sleep and wake up late but we told ourselves "sedar diri sikit, kau tu pemalas, duduk rumah tak belajar so baik kau datang sekolah. Ada jugak kau bukak buku" hahahaha 😂😂 Saudi was forced to come because  I NEED to teach him. There were a lot to teach though. Alhamdulillah, we all did well for our final exam and repeat papers!

Pengajian Am                A
Bahasa Melayu              A
Sejarah                         C
Pengajian Perniagaan    B+
CGPA                            3.33

I swear I was so frustrated over Sejarah paper. There was this one question about faktor nasionalisme di Indonesia abad 80-an kot. I was so confused between Perang Jawa and those Persatuan Nasional Indonesia, Sarekat Islam etc. I know Perang Jawa lasts for 5 years but I didn't know during what year it happened. Sooo, stupidly, I wrote about PNI, Sarekat Islam blabla as the answers when actually the correct one was faktor tercetusnya Perang Jawa OH GOD I KNOW THE FACTORS CLEARLY BUT I WROTE THE WRONG ONE BECAUSE THE YEAR PERANG JAWA HAPPENED WASN'T STATED IN THE NOTES THAT I'VE BEEN READING DURING MY REVISION I'M ASDFGHJKL I WAS SO FRUSTRATED THAT I KEEP THINKING OF IT WHICH MAKES ME STILL REMEMBER THE FACTORS UNTIL NOW CAN YOU SEE HOW REGRETFUL I FEEL ABOUT IT OH HOW SAD.

For my repeat papers, alhamdulillah, everything improved! Allahu, I was so thankful knowing that my efforts and my parent's money that were used to pay to sit for it paid off! I cried at my workplace because I checked my result when I was at work hahaha! Fortunately there weren't many customers at my workplace when I cried 😅

Pengajian Am                A-
Sejarah                         A

First semester repeat result

Sejarah                         A-
Pengajian Perniagaan    A

Second semester repeat result

As for the assignments, I got A for all of it, alhamdulillah. Thanks to all of the teachers' help, I can't believe I got A for Pengajian Perniagaan's assignment. It was sooo hard! We had to make business plan and the financial part really makes me (well I think everyone in the class) want to kill myself!! 🤧 I salute those businessman who made business plan because it ain't easy. For Bahasa Melayu's assignment, my group made a study about peribahasa. So my overall result after being combined with repeat result is:

Pengajian Am                A
Bahasa Melayu              A
Sejarah                         B+
Pengajian Perniagaan    A
CGPA                            3.83

SHOCKING!! AND I'M SO THANKFUL FOR IT! Alhamdulillah, I managed to make my parent proud of me again 💖 So what I learned is never give up (although I have always feel like it hahaha) just because you failed once, it doesn't mean you will fail forever. Failure is the mother of success, right? 😉 take your time, you will soon get the hang of it. Everyoneee, good luck in everything you do! Never stop believing in yourself and pray- pray with all of your heart, pray with the feeling where you believe your prayers will be granted by Him. InsyaAllah, everything will be okay 💝😊