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Comeback
Wednesday, January 21, 2015 @ 1:09 AM | 0 EXOtic[s]
Assalamualaikum, hello! Omg it has been quite long since I posted something here! Thanks to Alifah for reminding me about my blog kekeke (and thanks for all the praises you gave me too) haha x)
Soooo, it's already 2015. Is it too late if I want to wish you Happy New Year? Erm well whatever, Happy New Year everyone hihihi yeay I'm not a school student anymore and huwaaaa I'm getting older T.T I don't have any new year resolution this year because I'm tired of making some but didn't even accomplish it ;p
So many things happened in 2014, but still, I am glad that I spent the year with great people, leaving me great memories to be remember even there were greater amount of sorrows and stresses because I believe that pain came to make us grow up and stay strong ^^
2015 is like a brand new year for me because on school day, I only stay at home, I don't have to wake up really early to go to school, and damn it, I feel freaking lonely :'( my parents are so busy with their works while my lil bro and lil sis are in boarding school. Our house is so quiet, I am so bored. Sometimes I think there's no point of living anymore. Being alone is actually scary because there will be so many scary thoughts filling your mind like "no one cares about me" "I hope I didn't exist" "I have no one" and maybe you'll think of committing suicide, nauzubillahi min zalik (and this is actually one of the reasons why I hate being outcast by my friends tho)
Oh I sent a long "letter" to my parents through whatsapp yesterday, at around 3:30am hehehe xD I cried so hard while typing it. Well you know, those emotions that haunt you when it's 1-5am where you keep thinking about the past, about the people in your life, about the pains, about your dreams, about the words you want to say but you can't, about the life that you imagine, and more. I keep reading it again and again, and I'm actually touched by what I wrote hahaha xD
I'm a troublemaker, I know. I hurt your feeling, a lot. I didn't do what you told me to do, a lot. I was mad at you, a lot. I also melawan, a lot. It's not like I want to, it's just because I'm too ego. I failed my exam a lot too. I'm sorry for the harsh words. I'm sorry for the scars I made on your heart.
some of the messages i sent to my parents
I also said "I love you so much" to them hahahahahahahahaha man, this is so not me. It wasn't like me to show my affection toward my family hahahahaha I wonder what's wrong with me that time tho xD well, still, I am proud of myself for doing so kekeke ;p
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welcome Hi, thanks for visiting. There aren't much fun things here as I only wrote my experiences and whatever I want to write, but I hope you have fun reading
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